A New Voter’s Dilemma

So my lifetime has seen 7 Lok Sabha Elections till date. The 2014 elections is going to be the first time, I would exercise my right of franchise as an Indian voter. I honestly have always been irritated with all those cynics (which include amazingly intelligent, smart and educated individuals) who can but refuse to vote yet never shy away from grumbling infinitely about our ‘deeply flawed democracy’ and our ‘system’ and how it will never change. I probably would equate our democracy to a really large dysfunctional family. Individual members might be very different and the dynamic between them really crazy but at the end of the day they chug along and somehow manage together. Which is why I do think it is important to vote. Considering how vast and diverse our country is, there is an urgent need of some semblance of stable leadership at the center.  

On April 10^th 2014, I will get a chance to vote from the Ghaziabad district (which is a very important one that borders Delhi) of Uttar Pradesh. The candidates that I am aware of include

-       General VK Singh (BJP) – Current sitting MP and party president Rajnath Singh will be fighting from Lucknow this election

-       Raj Babbar (Congress)

-       Shazia Illmi (AAP)

I look at these names of candidates and parties flashing at my face and my moral high ground of how I am contributing to the good of the country over all those cynics who are not voting just seems to vanish into thin air. I got to say deciding who to vote for especially in this election is ridiculously difficult. After much confusion I have decided that as its Lok Sabha, and as I am giving my vote essentially to the party and its leader who occupies the central government of India, I will overlook the candidate and choose a party. If I go party wise:

BJP: The implication of NaMo becoming the Prime Minister of India is just too enormous where deciding to give my vote to this party is concerned. I have never known a political figure to be as polarizing as Narendra Modi is. There must be at least a million articles about this. Where my feelings are concerned about him being PM, I’d just like to direct any person reading this post to the below link which is an answer given on Quora.

https://www.quora.com/Politics-of-India-1/Would-you-as-a-member-of-a-minority-community-in-India-confidently-vote-for-Narendra-Modi-to-become-PM

I couldn’t possibly write a better answer and provide a simpler logic as the writer of this answer has provided as to why I wouldn’t want him to become PM. I find it difficult to believe that people don’t feel the slightest bit uncomfortable deep inside about wanting to vote for him. Anyway it seems that BJP is trying desperately hard to shoot itself on the foot with all the idiotic infighting going on within and the whole Pramod Muthalik episode (what on earth were they even thinking? I remember the epic time in my college days where so many of us sent pink chaddis as a part of a protest campaign against this moron’s party members attacking a bunch of women in a pub in Mangalore). I gotta say considering the Congress has pulled out all stops to ensure that it doesn’t have an iota of chance of winning, BJP messing up this golden opportunity for itself will be like snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

Congress: If it were any election before this, I admit that I would have blindfolded myself and just voted for the Congress as my family has always been traditional Congress supporters. I guess the logic was that they were ‘secular’ and (with the risk of being torn apart for saying this) they had the most balanced view point on policy issues compared to the extreme left or right alternatives. But considering the performance (or the lack of it) of the UPA 2 government and the sheer disgust it evokes from the disillusioned Indian population now, the congress guys might as well start warming their arse on the opposition seats of the parliament before the polling even begins. I had some respect for outgoing PM Manmohan Singh but his appalling lack of leadership and complete inability to put his foot down and take a firm stand during crisis situations like all those various shameful scams was bitterly disappointing and infuriating to say the least. If the thought of NaMo becoming PM is scary, the thought of Rahul Gandhi occupying the chair is really a bad joke. And it really doesn’t help that the latter chose to showcase himself as a clueless idiot on national television.

AAP: The despair with the current political set up is what led to the formation of this party. And to be fair, I do appreciate the intentions of this party. It takes tremendous guts to leave a comfortable life and all that you have been doing to get into the dirty and mucky world of politics to try and change things for the better like a lot of the prominent personalities of this party have done. But these guys are rank beginners and really have a long way to go But as one of my best friends put it, not having an ideology is very problematic which does make it difficult for me to vote for them because I don’t know what their stand is on so many critical issues. As per their own admission, they are still evolving. I think Arvind Kejriwal mentioned in some interview that they were “not leftists, not right wing, not centrists but solutionists”. Have to admit that right now it sounds like amusing ideal speak.  They have and continue to assimilate such a motley crew of people from such extreme ideologies, that you sometimes can’t help but wonder how they are going to find a common ground and figure out their stance on so many of the vital issues. Their short stint in Delhi was marred in controversy and really did reflect their inexperience and immaturity to some extent. In short I’d be really hesitant in voting for them because I am quite confused as to what they really bring to the table and whether they would be able to transition from activism to governance.  

The Left or regional parties like SP, BSP etc etc: No way in hell!!

NOTA: Gotta say, this is damn tempting under the current circumstance. But rationally speaking I really don’t get the point of this. Might as well not vote than to give into this option.

After writing all this, I just wonder – should it be so difficult to vote for a politician in India? Why don’t there appear to be men and women of great caliber who are a part of this profession? How is it that being a blood relative of an existing politician, a cricketer, a Bollywood film star guarantees you such an easy ticket to becoming one? How the f#%$ do people with frightening criminal records and pending cases even get the opportunity to contest in elections? Why isn’t there a really tough screening process, like say the UPSC process for government officers, before entrusting politicians with one of the biggest responsibilities of running a country? My granddad is a retired IAS officer. There is a famous story in my family about how he one night fainted in exhaustion because of excessive studying for UPSC exams. We may really curse the bureaucrats but they really prove their worth by going through probably the toughest screening process in the world to become government officers. For what really? To report to some incompetent inept person who got an easy ticket to become a politician. It’s not that my dad or subsequently I inherited my granddad’s power. Why should it be any different for a politician’s kid? I don’t know whether it’s true but I read somewhere that the Congress had approached Sachin Tendulkar to contest elections directly versus Narendra Modi. Is this some cheap type popularity contest? I was under the impression that we were talking about running a nation here. Uggggh!!

After this rant, I am exactly where I started. No clue who to vote for. April 10^th should be interesting….

Latest Update: Just a day after writing this, turns out that due to last moment plans, I am not in town for voting on polling day. Maybe its better given my confusion but am disappointed none the less.

The most important lessons I learnt from the Beatles

So one of the Quora questions go like - "What is the most important lesson that you have learnt from the Beatles?" Hell since its about the Beatles, I am the last person who would be left behind expressing my views on this.

To start with Beatles music is some sort of magic drug for me. But to avoid mushy intros and get straight to the point about the lessons learnt:

1) There are a few things in life which are worth hoping for and getting hurt for….love is definitely one of them!

2) Happiness, hope and optimism is NOT found in some major profound event but in the small everyday highs of life like getting by with the help of friends, coming home to a loved one after a hard day, dancing with your crush, learning how to be ‘you’ in time, knowing that someone still loves you despite badly messing up etc

3) It’s unbelievable how the biggest of inspiration can lie in the simplest of lyrics in some of the most mundane songs of the Beatles. So I'm talking about this song called "Birthday". In this there's this line which goes, "I would like you to dance....to take a chance!!"

Basically for a painfully reserved person who always would prefer to stay away from the dance floor as far as possible (both literally and metaphorically)  and would choose to watch from the sidelines, this one line is sort of a mountain of encouragement to take risks and put oneself out there. Ok to be fair, my best friends have been my biggest cheer leaders for doing a lot of the "courageous" things that I have done and I honestly have a long long LONG way to still go in this regard. But the fact is when my friends are nowhere around me to bulldoze me into doing something I really want to do, when I am feeling shit scared and all I want to do is play safe, I actually play these lyrics in my head. And trust me Paul McCartney crooning "Take a ch..ch..ch...chaaannce" with so much of conviction is really difficult to ignore! And believe it or not I have done things like making new friends, being more open about my feelings, trying out new things which I would ordinarily never have the guts to do, singing in public…

4) Shit happens. You get royally rejected (in job, love anything), you fall out of love, you miss the past, you act like a complete jerk sometimes and seriously regret it, people treat you badly and drive you crazy... Its ok to brood, feel lonely, intensely negative, depressed, paranoid and really insecure sometimes. But it's really better to minimize the time you feel sorry for yourself, get up your ass and do something about it or move on because ultimately things get better and work out in the end....that is if you choose it to be.

5) After time, music is perhaps the greatest healer.

Cricket Musings

I haven’t followed cricket properly for the last 6 odd months. So this blog post has the danger of sounding naïve and uneducated. Last 2 years have seen a huge number of high profile retirements in the international arena. My heart just broke with the retirements of Rahul Dravid and Jacques Kallis. Somehow I really can’t help feeling that the exit of these 2 and all the others who I have grown up watching has firmly placed an expiry date to my cricket watching days (unless I get to work in the ICC or ESPN Cricinfo. How kickass would that be??? :D). I guess this gloomy prediction is also due to my complete aversion to IPL which just seems to be getting bigger every year despite all the murky and sleazy shit that take place in this tournament. Even the T-20 world cup or any T-20 match for that matter seems so shallow. Wow, think I have really become a boring dingbat of a grandmother at the age of 24!

I am going to pen down my thoughts on a couple of cricketers for the time being.

Graeme Smith -  I never really liked the guy I admit. It mostly had to do with the fact that he replaced, as captain of South Africa, my favourite cricketer Shaun Pollock who had been sacked in an awful manner after South Africa crashed out of the 2003 World Cup in a tragic and really bizarre manner. He was just 22 when he took over as captain and I found him a big loud mouth, really brash and arrogant which was in complete contrast to the gentleman that Polly was. Fast forward 11 years later….Graeme Smith retired from international cricket last month…..still as the captain of South Africa. And to be honest, I find this in itself a remarkable achievement. Any bloke who survives as the captain for 11 years in a cut throat international sport environment, taking his team to great heights (despite not winning any world cup as usual) without being an extraordinary player himself – is truly worthy of praise. He was a natural leader. He had this fire in his belly, was supremely confident, had this real urge to outwit his competitors, wouldn’t take bull shit from anyone, was pretty ruthless, infused a lot of passion and a never give up attitude in his team and fiercely protective of his team members and his country. Under him there was definitely a spark in the SA team for sure. That incredible 438 match versus Australia where SA beat all odds to win the greatest match in ODI history for me for truly representative of what the SA cricket team became under his leadership. (He himself scored a quick fire 90 in that match). I read an article in cricinfo which said it South Africa would find it more difficult to replace Graeme Smith than Jacques Kallis as it is way more difficult to replace a fantastic leader than a fantastic cricketer. Keeping my personal liking aside, I agree with the statement 100%

Farewell Biff! You truly were extraordinary and you will be missed.

An observation that struck me after writing this: In the gentleman’s game, it is ironic that the ‘gentlemen’ don’t seem to make good captains. Think Rahul Dravid, Sachin Tendulkar, Shaun Pollock (who were all sacked) as opposed to Nasser Hussain, Sourav Ganguly, Michael Clarke, Graeme Smith etc.

Alastair Cook – Oh boy! This might take a while. So my only blog post last year was ridiculing what a flimsy team Australia had become. I had even posted it as a comment on Cricinfo which got published as a “Featured comment” much to my pleasure. When my dad read it, he warned me that if I looked at the past, Australia is a team that has a legacy of never remaining rubbish for too long and I would really feel foolish in the near future for having posted that comment. Turns out the man was right……as usual L.

The 2013 Ashes drubbing in Australia was a nightmarish disaster to put it in the mildest sense for a person who was supporting England and considers Alastair Cook as one’s favourite current cricketer. From Cook’s point of view as captain, Murphy’s law played out in the most perfect manner possible. There wasn’t even one English player (including the captain himself) – bowler, batsman, allrounder who was in some semblance of form. Trott went home suffering from depression. Graeme Swann announced a shock retirement bang in the middle of the series. Thankfully I didn’t get to watch any of this on TV but from what I read and heard, English players had never looked so clueless, unprepared and hopeless.

I gotta say I feel desperately bad for Cooky. I do get what it is like to hit such an alarming professional low. I guess that in his case, the stakes are so much higher. Now he faces biting criticism about his style of captaincy (all past achievements of winning 3-0 in England Ashes, winning a test series in India and leading his team to Champions Trophy finals almost winning it don’t count for squat apparently) and about the way he handled the Pietersen issue. To be brutally honest, I was quite shocked maybe more disappointed about the way he seems to have handled Pietersen or at least the way it has been reported. After all it does seem abysmally foolish to let go of your by far best player who is clearly a world class genius in terms of talent. I have always thought of Alastair Cook as a man of integrity and don’t even now think that he’s the kind of person who would not own up to responsibility and escape punishment by putting the blame squarely on someone else. KP’s really one maverick. Even his most ardent fans would agree that other than his match winning knocks, one thing that he’s really been consistent in is creating quite a nuisance in the England set up. Independent of my personal liking towards AC, I personally felt that KP’s messaging of derogatory texts about his then England captain, Andrew Strauss to the opposition should have spelt the end of his career. But they stuck with him and it’s really unfair to say that England hasn’t given him a chance. The fact that he has played 100+ tests is a testimony to this fact. You know from personal experience, I think there reaches this unbearable breaking point where it is not possible to take any more bullshit from a person and you lash back in the most vicious manner which might actually be quite harsh. Probably that is what happened in this entire saga. Who really is to know?

Coming back to Ali Cook, the most important reason why I really like back is his ability to bounce back from horrid failures. I remember in June 2010 series in England versus Pakistan, he was in such bad form that he was in the verge of getting sacked. By his admission that series was the closest he had ever got to crying. Then came the December 2010 Ashes in Australia where he scored an extraordinary 766 runs in 5 matches. After not even being considered in the England ODI side for the World Cup in India 2011, he was appointed as ODI captain amidst severe criticism of being “a plodder with the bat and a donkey in the field” by former English captain, Mike Atherton. As a result of tremendous hard work (by training with his county Essex during off season) and determination, his average and strike rate shot up dramatically. The dude is really a fighter. The blunt fact is that is skills are not are expansive and incredible as some of his contemporaries, but the point that his stats is comparable with theirs if not better despite his limits and hitting all these lows that he has. This speaks volumes of his mental strength and the toughness of character (qualities which are unfortunately very very underrated) and the fact that he is one person who has really earned his success. So will he bounce back from the catastrophe which happened in Australia? It was obvious he was shaken out of his wits. He was actually contemplating resigning from ODI captaincy (England got mauled even there 4-1) which is something that I would never ever expect him to do. It seemed that he had enough. I really hope that a rejuvenating break and his yet to be born first kid infuses his life with positivity again.  Somehow I know he will get out of this rut. He always has bounced back……and the day he does, I won’t hesitate to write a blog post which says “Man, I told you so!!”

MH 370 mystery

Have really been disturbed and hauntingly intrigued by the news of the disappearance of the Malaysian airlines flight to Beijing 5 days back. After all in this age of sophisticated technology, how can an airlines just disappear into thin air with everything seemingly fine before it mysteriously vanishes from the radar? Also with all the multi country intensive effort, how is it proving to be so difficult to locate this plane? It must be just so unbearable and devastating for the relatives of the passengers of this plane to have no clue what has happened to their loved ones. More than anything else, it is perhaps the feeling of utter, sheer helplessness they must be experiencing as all they can possibly do in such a garbage dump of a situation is to wait and pray. The fact is not knowing is probably a million times worse than knowing for sure that the worst possible outcome has taken place because somewhere humans by nature have the tendency to cling on to the tiniest of hope, however unreasonable, that things might just turn out to be ok. I am a great believer in hope but in the event of the most tragic outcome taking place and not having knowledge of it - this very same hope can prevent you from getting closure and ultimately moving on in life with time. I saw this picture splashed on a news site of a 4 year old Chinese girl praying for her father to return safely. There was something about that photo which just makes you feel that someone has wrenched your heart out of your body and powdered it into pieces. It made me think how much we take our life and our loved ones for granted. That it can just take a microsecond for our world to crash. That we fret over and feel sorry for ourselves and our lives over the most IDIOTIC SHITTY things in life. That it is just a matter of pure luck and chance (and maybe a God) that we or a loved one is not at the wrong place at the wrong time. There are so many theories floating around including frightening possibilities like a terrorist attack etc. I really think it would be very insensitive and disrespectful from my part to the feelings of the relatives and friends of those passengers who must be going through such agony and increasing mental torture with each passing minute to speculate and debate over what's the most 'logical' explanation of what must have happened on this forum especially in the scenario of almost zilch evidence. I found it sickening that in todays news they were casting aspersions over the competency of the young 27 year old co pilot over some past irresponsible behavior. God, if you are listening, now would really a good time to validate the belief of your most ardent of your followers and convince your skeptics that miracles do exist..

Latest Update: The Malaysian PM has officially declared the plane as lost. Really hope for the sake of family and friends of all the passengers and crew on board, that they discover with concrete evidence, what happened to the damn plane.

The decline of the Aussie cricket team

Ok, I have to say that cricket on TV was a huge part of my childhood. The last 23 years of my life, I have always remembered any cricket channel, telecasting every Tom, Dick and Harry match, continuously running in my household for most part of the day. My unusual craze of cricket is attributed to my old man who I must mention has sort of shifted his allegiance to club football the past few years. My loyalty has remained with cricket and its players. My active memories of following this sport start from the 1999 World Cup where I clearly recall Australia trouncing the living daylights of a very strong Pakistan team. For the next decade or so, that was what Australia was about - they were invincible. I remember beginning to harbour this deep hatred for this team that just kept on winning. I suppose I hated the fact that they were so arrogant and had truckloads of attitude. The truth was that they were really good and they knew it. They didn't really give a rat's fart about being a likable team. They just cared about making a mincemeat of their opposition. I remember almost being in tears when Mathew Hayden would just tear though mercilessly and blow apart my all time favourite cricketer  Shaun Pollock. I remember the sinking feeling in my stomach when Michael Bevan would successfully complete just any sort of run chase anywhere and at anytime. I hated the guts of Glenn McGrath, Ricky Ponting and Shane Warne. To my chagrin, I saw these guys lift 3 consecutive world cups, 2 champion trophies in the 2000's decade despite my constant prayers that any team win but those arrogant Aussies. That team was so fiercely competitive, so intimidating and were so proud. There was such thrill and pleasure in those rare occasions when those 'invincibles' got beaten whether the 2001 series in India, 2005 Ashes in England or that 438 runs match vs SA.When  look back now, I realize that its difficult not to have a grudging admiration for that team cause though I hate to admit it - they  were something else....from a different planet....really really special. Today as I saw Australia being eliminated from a global tournament without  winning a SINGLE match and as a team which cannot remotely boast of a single world class player, a realization has hit hard that an era has truly passed. I don't even agree when people say that the current Australian team is a shadow of its former self. At least a shadow retains the shape of the original element. Their predecessor was genuinely feared  the world over . I don't think this team could even scare a fly. At the way things are looking now, I will probably talk about that great Australian team to my future generation the same way my dad has so passionately talked about the famous West Indies team of the 1970's all these years. Funnily enough though, despite all the hatred, all the anger, all the abusing, the frustration I have felt all these years about the Australian cricket team, their humiliating deterioration has left an empty feeling in my heart.

Expressions 2

"Those eyes like a solitary night...

So beautiful....so much of depth..

Expressing so much that you get overwhelmed

And yet...full of mystery."

________________________________________________________________________

"Don't be a person who is so cynical and pessmistic that you are hell bent on extracting darkness from rays of sunshine."

________________________________________________________________________

"So glad was I to leave that place,

 A place which taught me the pain of lonliness,

 A place which taught me that the opposite of love was not hate,

 But where the opposite was apathy, not giving a damn 

 Which is a feeling so full of misery....a feeling that sucks all the hope...

 the hope that makes you look forward to all things good in life

 the hope that makes you believe that you'll be happy again

 So after all these years, why do I find myself thinking of you?

 Was it because you painstakingly broke all the barriers 

 that I had built around me so efficiently 

 that not even a single soul could peep into

 a heart that was shattered into pieces, a mind that was hurting 

 Was it because in your serene face and your soothing voice,

 I found a sense of belonging which I didn't notice and took for granted

 because I was so busy feeling sorry for myself for all that I had lost.

 As I saw your taxi speeding away from me all those years ago,

 With my eyes filled with tears and my hardened heart aching with sadness..

 I should have known that time, what I realize today,

 And which I want you to know though you're 10000 miles away from me,

 That the place I thought was the most insignificant,

 taught me one of the most valuable lessons I have learnt till date,

 The lesson of unconditional love,

 Caring for someone not because that person fulfills a a selfish need of yours,

 But caring with a heart so pure that it makes the person feels alive again...

 A gift so rare that it can only be only send from the heavens above

 And it's all because of you.....

 Thank you for loving me."

Expressions

They call me the simple girl next door,
But to those who are close to me, I am so much more......
I might not be the most extrovert,
But an interesting person I am, I can confidently assert
Although silly movies never fail to reduce me to tears,
I am brave and strong beyond my years,
Family and close friends are incredibly important to be me indeed,
Because as the Beatles rightly sing - love is all you need
My mom complains I watch too much cricket per day,
But my favourite cricketers fill my life with optimism and hope, I say
Honesty and genuineness are qualities, with which I burst,
As my deep rooted belief is that nice guys always finish first
I dream to be the best I can ever be,
For this leading a balanced life is the best way I see
They call me the simple girl next door,
But to myself, I am so much more.....